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Context is a tricky thing...
» August 10, 2004 3:36 PM by Jakob
There are some statements that, when taken in context, can be amusing. Then there are those that need... nay, require that you take them out of context. This past week, I came across two that sit on either side of the context fence.
CONTEXT BE DAMNED:
"I'm like God that way." If you overhear someone make this statement, I guarantee you that you are suddenly interested in the conversation. The context does not matter, only the outrageousnessosity* of the statement. In fact, I'm not even going to give you the context because it's better without it.
NEEDS CONTEXT:
"Now all I need is a car." All alone, this sentence is not funny, nor interesting. But if you're walking down the street and a man skates by on a skateboard as he talks into his cell phone, and the sentence, "Now all I need is a car" is the one snippet of his conversation that you hear as he glides by... well...
*Yes, I made that word that up.**
**I'm like God that way.
Comments
Great 'Out of Context' text:
"If Basquiat wasn't dead and gay..."
"You just KNOW it was the Sherpa's fault..."
"If you've made wampum, you've earned wampum..."
Posted by: nicole | August 10, 2004 4:38 PM
And then there are statements that are hard to perceive as ever having a context. Such as, "Do you shit bubble wrap?"
Posted by: jakob | August 10, 2004 5:20 PM
"You just KNOW it was the Sherpa's fault" is an instant classic.
Posted by: ryan | August 10, 2004 11:31 PM
I wonder what Andrew Wollman thinks.
The world may never know.
Posted by: nicole | August 11, 2004 10:39 AM
Who is this Woll Man that you speak of? I know of no Woll Man.
Posted by: jakob | August 11, 2004 11:44 AM
He's supposed to be Turkish.
Some say his father was German.
Nobody ever believed he was real. Nobody ever knew him or saw anybody that ever worked directly
for him.
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
One story the guys told me, the story I believe, was from his days in Turkey.
There was a gang of Hungarians that wanted their own sketch comedy show. They realized that to be funny, you didn't need jokes or money or even numbers. You just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't.
Wollman showed these men of will what will really was. He entertained their kids. He performed for their wives. He performed for their parents and their parents' friends. He performed in the houses they live in, the stores they work in. He entertained the people that owe them money.
And like that, he's gone.
Underground.
Nobody's ever seen him since.
He becomes a myth, a spook story that comedians tell their kids at night. "If you bomb on stage, Andrew Wollman will get you."
But no one ever really believes.
Ryan Gantz always said, "I don't believe in God, but I find him funny."
Well, I believe in God -- and the only thing that amuses me (dramatic pause) is Andrew Wollman.
Oh, and Jakob White...that kid is EFFING HILARIOUS!
Posted by: nicole | August 11, 2004 12:17 PM
When did I say that I find God funny?
That bastard.
Posted by: Ryan | August 16, 2004 9:29 AM
Oh, wait...I'm all mixed up...it's God that laughs AT YOU. My bad. Shit on me.
Posted by: nicole | August 16, 2004 3:38 PM
I would like to make a pre-emptive strike against any possible Cleveland Steamer jokes in reference to Nicole's last comment.
Posted by: jakob | August 16, 2004 4:33 PM
You need not protect me. I'll shoot back with a "Dirty Sanchez" or "Red Wings" quip, or perhaps a "Toledo Tooter Flooter", or maybe a "San Fran Pinky Stink" or a "Whoop, there it is!" or a "Bread and Potato Sandwich" or a "Lucky Truckee" or a "Bullfrog Magpie" or maybe, just maybe, I'll go taboo and reference an "Alec Baldwin."
Eeeeeewwwwwwwww. (Shudder.)
Posted by: nicole | August 17, 2004 8:26 AM