Rounding 90 Years.

posted 27 Mar 2006, 3PM | 4 Comments

We suprised my granfather for his 90th birthday, and it was everything we'd hoped. Grumpy (his nickname since long before I was born) didn't see the suprise coming; he laughed and danced to the mumbly-voiced keyboard player, cried during the slide show and his son's speech, danced with my grandmother like there was no tomorrow. I caught up with extended family, introduced people to Jenny, ate yummy food. And I watched Grumpy closely, trying to read his face for secrets, seated in that same green blazer.

my banner for grandpaThe scrapbook gift we assembled contained photos of Grumpy with hundreds of people, letters praising his patience and generosity. How do I wrap my head around 90 when I haven't even hit 30? I don't event know what I'm doing in six hours. Breathe.

I'm starting to... get on my own nerves. Lately I'm sporadically caustic and impatient with people I care the most about. Not always, but too often. It took me until age 20 to feel like I had control over the words coming out of my mouth... and now I'm starting to regress, it seems. Wit makes for a wicked weapon when poorly wielded. What? Wait. I think the stress of long freelance hours, moving, money, wedding planning and daily banter with Jenny has begun to wear on me. Sometimes I wake up with a jaw sore from clenching. My body feels older. BREATHE.

I'm going to keep studying Grumpy closely. He listens, he watches, and doesn't mind waiting. This shouldn't be a race. I feel like I know the secret, but stopped putting it into practice. Is that the central irony of modern life?

There are 4 Comments


27 Mar 06 at 05:21PM cheamp said:

It is winter. I have felt much of the same of late, impatience and laziness mostly. A busy schedule and no excercise or adventure has left me reeling into indulgences; food, selfishness, booze. It's made me try and be alone to hear my thoughts out. It is winter and the sun is slowly coming back to us, it will learn us patience and gratitude.


28 Mar 06 at 03:30PM Nicole said:

Sweet & acidic are two flavors to love.


28 Mar 06 at 04:34PM lobster said:

My grandmother just turned 90 recently, too. Isn't it wonderful to have such old, venerable people in one's family?


11 Apr 06 at 08:15PM Jake said:

Hit the nail on the head ryan. Knowing "the secret" and living the answer are very distant things. Often times for me knowing the answer often precludes using it. But the forest for the trees disease as I call it, is very much the defining characteristic of modern man. That or gender role reversal and porn leading to a plethora of pre-teen blowjobs. My alliteration has never worked.

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